Nothing but Love

I saw you and I want to talk to you. You saw me and you smiled. Then I smiled back. Days passed and I’m seeing you every day and you know that. You crashed into me several times and I know that you like me. You gave me tons of chances I never saw them. I want to dance with you and I know you like to join me. All I have to do is ask. You waited for me and I waited for you. But we both know deep inside we are communicating.  I want to be with you and I want to touch you and I know you feel the same. I want to take you for a walk, hold you in my arms, hug you tight and make you feel secure. All I have to do is reach for your hand. Our feelings are mutual and there is “nothing” that can break us. All I have to do is come near to you.

Weeks passed and then I saw him smiling at you. You smiled back. But I know your eyes are watching me. He crashed into you and you know it. He came up to you and you talked .he asked you to dance and you did. He took you to dine, then for a walk and you held his hands. He hugged you tight and you cuddled.

Months passed and the time has come. He knelt on his knees to pray for your love for the rest of his life and you answered his prayers.

I was there all the time watching you. But your eyes stopped looking for me and your lips stopped smiling at me.

There is nothing wrong with neither you nor me. Because all I did was nothing but love and that’s the “nothing” that broke us.

You are happy and secure in his hands and I hope you live happily ever after. I am dark and timid left with scattered memories.

Now you have a lovely life and I’m left with a pen and a paper that tells the tale of a tainted heart.

--- END ---

A Street Diamond

                    

There was a boy who is lean and little but shiny and smiley. He was bullied by his friends. He was flogged with canes and was pushed into puddles. He was insulted and humiliated in every possible way. But he never cried nor complained. He knew that he was treated badly. Yet still he goes out every day to play or get played. He knew that they will throw stones at him and yet he brought them cookies. He was dropped out in every game yet he watched them play. He knew that no one liked him yet he loved everyone. He knew there is plenty of happiness around him, but he never wished for it. He never had the luck of having the joy. Yet he thanks god for the life he has.  No one knows where does he live and no one cared either. He never went to school, but always roams around it. They thought he was a retard and ignored him, but he knew he is not. He is different.

He is different because his life doesn’t start with bread and butter every day.  It starts with drinking water under a street tap. His life won’t let him to go to school. It wants him to pick the trash every morning.  He hardly gets his daily food yet he shares it with the little money he got. He waits outside the school to join the kids to play. He takes the beatings and shares the cookies because they are the only people who keep him company. He never cried since he has no tears left inside. He never complained and thanks god instead.  He smiles like a prince and shines like a gem. He lives with a faith and fights with a hope. This little boy is a street diamond.

P.S :  Every year  thousands of kids are going homeless

Global estimates suggest that between 30 to 150 million children and young people live on the streets of the major cities and towns in the world. Nearly all street children have some form of contact with a family member. Sadly, most children don’t maintain any contact with their family because of the circumstances that pushed them onto the streets in the first place. Poverty, physical and sexual abuses are the three main reasons street children give as to why they have ended up living on the streets. Predominantly boys claim to have been physically abused whilst girls claim to have been sexually abused before leaving home. Sometimes the pressure of poverty together with social vulnerability and exclusion increase the likelihood of young children joining the population of street children worldwide.

This is dedicated for those Diamonds who rise above all.

------ END -------

I Miss You

I may not have known you long, but I liked you since the moment we spoke. I enjoyed every second being with you and I can't thank you enough. You’ve been a fantastic friend so far and I hope you would be by my side forever. You’ve shown me your bright and dark sides and every memory of you made me closer to you. You are a unique charm that shines even in the dark.


I've given you some hard times and I still feel sorry for it. I have not been such a good pal, but I promise I'll make it up to you. I don't want to be a fool by making a mistake again. I might have hidden some things about me, but I never lied to you. I will not ask you to trust me because trust is something that should be earned. I know you deserve better and I will never make you suffer.


I just wish you’d come back to me soon because ever since you left me, I missed the fun of being with you.


I feel a gap in my life from your absence and every moment of it is making me more anxious about you.


You left me in sweet pain and I’m enjoying it.
Your absence only makes my heart grow fonder.


All I want you to know is that
I like you,
I care about you,
and
I miss you.

The Independence

A country of reign that was once worshipped and envied by many is now a minority and a poor developing nation. A nation that always seeks peace and never went on a war is now a dirty land with thick people. A country which once sold piles of diamonds in the streets is now drowning in poverty.      A country which contributed a great deal of knowledge in the evolution of the world is now has nothing left to write its pride.

Today I stand as a common Indian in front of a hoisted flag among the people who are singing the national anthem with their lips but not heartily. This day is a remembrance of those people who hoped for a free India, who shed every drop of their blood for it. How many of us really think that we are paying tribute to them? For many today is just a holiday to hoist a flag, share some sweets and to say “oh yeah! It’s our Independence day”.

The celebration of real Independence is when we feel the minimum responsibility for our country.  We might have 65 years of Independence now, but we aren’t the same anymore. We lost the glory that we used to have.

“65” years and we are still a developing nation. Even after 65 years from now, will still be a developing nation. We all know what’s happening in our country, yet we still don’t care.

It’s time to give a ray of hope that our poor country needs. That’s the least we can do to our motherland.

 All we have to do is to stop being a shame to our country.

It might be odd to stand alone and rise among the shameful society, but trust me my friend you are not alone. You just have to put your step forward and the rest pours in.

If it’s not you, who else?

I hope one day we will celebrate the real Independence Day.

“The Journey of A Thousand Miles Begins With A Single Step”.

The cryptic mind

Things change really fast in life… opinions , interests , tastes ,and woman. I wonder why no one ever created a device which can analyze a female mind.  It’s a shame to the great brains of twenty first century. Why are they so complicated . They act like they love you for life today  and the very next minute they will hate you like hell.

They say they don’t know anything about us but they will track us. They say they don’t  give a damn about you ,but  they do.

Some times its really hard to believe the truth. I donno if they are not prepared for it or they just hate to live with a truthful person.

If we truly like them and if we say that they really are special to us. They just think that we are playing around.

And they’ll say  “I bet you say this to every girl.”

What are they???

Few days ago we are like the best couple on earth and now I’m just a guy and she is just  a  friend.

What ever they are,they are the reason for a guy to be happy or sad. They might be weird at times but they are mostly sweet and loving. We just have to accept and face every situation with them. It might be good or bad.

Above all  we need them just  like they need us.

The Last words of a Loser

           

This is it. The day has come .The day that I never dreamt of. The day that I never wanted to happen.

This is the outmost shame of my life that I made someone an element to betrayal.

Today I stood as a convict of honesty and truth. I never thought that I would do such thing like that. The pain of losing someone’s trust is unbearable. I broke their faith in me.

I stood as an absolute loser by dropping a valuable heart. I made them bitter and I know they hate me.

I’ve earned very few hearts in the course of my life. I’ve been honest and open to them.

Of course I lied many but those lies will never affect my stand on friendship and love. And I never faked my Identity. I was accused of being another person now. The fact is I don’t even know what kind of person I am.

It’s not their fault of judgment against me because I think I’ve never had a heart to fill someone’s affection and never had a slightest chance of gaining the trust. May be I’m not even a person. I’m a savage.

I am my problem. I am my nemesis. No one ever believed me. Not even my own family had the trust. They know that I’m a retard. I feel sorry for them. They deserve a better son. They deserve a better brother they deserve a much better person than me. I’m the disappointment of my family. No wonder that someone who I never met has lost faith in me. I think they are right. I might me a Liar and a killer of trust.

I lost a sweet person today. I was hated. I was crushed and steeped down to the ground.

It’s obvious that I stand alone in the dark every time and I got used to it. But I never felt so bad like this. I made a person look like a fool for trusting me. I am a sick bastard.

A sweet melt down to sorrow because of my cruelness. It served with everything I desired and always smiled for me. It sweetened my heart offering it self when needed. It served me and pleasured me till the very last bite. All it asked from me is a speck of Trust and Honesty.

From the bottom of my heart I feel bad for losing a person who is so sweet all the time and affectionate. I still know that I’m honest and true. But all I don’t know is me. And when I know what I am, I’ll be a complete man.

I wish I could be forgiven. But I don’t think I deserve that.

Am I a Liar? Am I a fraud?

No.

Am I a loser? Am I a zero?

Yes.

These might be my last words because it takes a heart to write something appealing and you now know that I’m heartless. Even if I had one, It’s rotten and broken.

--- THE END ---

In the Dark

                                     In the Dark

                                                        - Johnny vas

Some times it takes more than one heart to understand a feeling. It might be joy or sorrow. Happy or sad. But if we have someone who can share and understand feelings then you are lucky. I spent alone in the dark to find the meaning of happiness. I hide myself in the dark, scared and distressed.

The dark is scary when your eyes are wide open.

The dark is peaceful when your eyes are closed.

It’s just the mind that makes you swing.

There will be light when you are happy and you can see a lot of people around you.

They come to you and they dance with you. They will share your joy and they will smile with you. You feel very secure and positive when you are happy in the light.

Then slowly you can see the light disappearing into thin air. They lights get dim. All the people you see around will move away. Their happy faces will be gone. You will see the dark forming around you. Every thing gets obscure and you will be the only one standing alone in the dark. The joy turns into sorrow and the smile turns into tears. No one will come to you even if you shout they will not look back for you. You will feel insecure. You will feel the fear.

But you have to search in the dark. There will be someone to hear you and stretching their hand to hold you and protect you.

I had nobody to help me in the dark. I searched them for years and shouted out loud for help. All those years of hell I thought of one thing. Why is everyone around you when you are happy and why there is no one when you are left in the dark.

The Answer is simple.

The world is timid to face the dark. The friends you have the relations you got are just to spend the time of light with you.

Then I realized that happy means peace and sorrow is scary. Either ways it is darkness around you.

When you realize this you will have the ultimate power to see all the things of life apparently in the dark.

You can only see the face of a person in the light but in the dark their real face will be revealed.

Now I no more fear to the dark. Happy or sad I learnt a way to be positive and and honest and one day you will know the true value of the dark.

Good luck My Friend.

A Fallen Angel

                         A Fallen Angel              
                                                              - Johnny vas.

In the Nights I sometimes see some falling stars in the sky. They looked like they are falling down to earth.

My mother once said that those were not stars. She said they are angels who come to visit our world. She says that they are beautiful and immortal.

I believed my mom. I believed that they come to earth and they fit them selves like us. They eat our food, they drink our wine, and they live in between us just like a normal person and when they die they will go back to heaven.

I know people think it’s silly and stupid because it is too far from reality and no one ever saw them. Most of us believe in God even if no one saw him.

Sometimes we believe it when we see it. Sometimes we have to believe it to see it.

I believe in the falling angels and I saw one of them. They don’t look any special than us. They are just like us. The fallen angel that I saw was so beautiful. She has those amazing eyes which are big and magical. She sprinkles her magic on us and we can spend the rest of our life looking into her eyes. Her lips are as smooth as the petals of a rose and juicy like the strawberries. She was so fair and luminous. Her complexion was a mixture of milk and gold. She is a sheer epitome of pure beauty. She was Elegant and honest.

She never fails to attract. She talks less but she never lies. She cares and trusts all. It’s her strength and also her weakness. She is an absolute charm.

We might have run into them at least once in our life. Sometimes we just get too busy with life ignoring such beauty and sometimes we fail to believe the existence of the fallen angel.

--- END ---

[ To Desi ]

johnnyvas.

The Inside

                    The Inside

                                       - Johnny vas.

There is a pain inside me. Deep and hollow.

 

I wish I could cry and let it out.

But something in my heart is suppressing it.

I pursue my life without any spice

Searching for a tiny speck of luck.

I fear the darkness around me.

Hiding and hoping for a spot of light.

Years passed and nothing changed.

I questioned god for being so hard.

Then a voice inside me whispered and said

Wake up you chuck! Stop passing the buck.

Yours is the life so make it up.

Yours is the triumph when you fight enough.

Withstand and engage till you see the light.

Face up the dark and never wish for luck.

That made my mind to open up wide.

My heart felt light like it came out from the hide.

I started my journey to win the Destiny.

I stood up firm holding spirit as my weapon.

I stay lionhearted with my heart as a shield.

I might fall down but I will never turn around.

I might be wounded but not defeated.

Soon comes a day where the battle ends.

So be patient and strong to sing the victory song.

--- End ---

The Rain

                      The Rain

                                               - Johnny vas

There was a lovely girl…  Joyful and small.

Came to me on a cloudy day and said

Hey dear brother... what a lovely day.

 I'm waiting for the rain to fall today.

I'll dance in the rain.

I'll hop in the water.

I also make paper boats to play in the stream.

I'll watch them sailing till the end of the street.

She was anxious and excited to welcome the rain.

She sat near the window looked up and smiled.

Looking at the sky for the rain to fall.

She waited and waited but the Rain never showed.

She then came to me crying and sorrowed.

Poor girl was so upset and broken.

I ought to solace her so I cuddled her and said

Oh my lovely sister please don’t cry.

The rain didn’t fall as the earth failed to pay.

so when it pays the God. The due amount

He will send the rain back to earth.

I wiped her tears and she smiled at me

She then ran back to her place with some thought in her mind

And came back fast with a piggy bank in her hands.

 Gave it to me and said.

Please ask god to take this as the Debt.

And send me the rain back.

 I was amused by her.

We both knelt down and prayed to him.

"Oh Dear Lord. The kindliest one.

Please accept this [piggy bank] for the sake of the earth.

We promise to you that we'll help it to clear the debt.

Have mercy on us and deliver us the rain.

So this beautiful girl can rejoice again."

I opened my eyes but she kept praying...

Telling the god how desperately she needs the rain.

I wonder why she likes it so much.

The very next day it started to rain.

She looked peachy and bright feeling the rain.

I know it is god who certainly did it.

Because he never failed to answer a poor girls dream.

---- End ----

An Ice cream story - Johnny vas

                                                                                

                                                                                                                      
Years ago…

I remember I was still a small guy but most lovable and active guy in school.

There used to be an ice cream parlor beside the school.

I don't like ice creams very much. But since the day I saw her... I fell in love.....with her and the Ice creams.

She was the prettiest girl I've ever seen.

She has the beautiful smile on earth...

She comes to the parlor everyday to have an ice cream and I use to stare at her every day but she never looked at me.

Days passed…

I couldn’t talk to her as I don't know how to start?

One day as she was eating her ice cream some one jerked her and the Ice cream fell down. Her beautiful milky cheeks turned red. Tears were rolling in her eyes. She sat on a bench helplessly. I couldn’t see her in the sorrow.

I ran to the parlor and bought an ice cream.
I went near to her. Placed it beside her.
It was the first time she saw me.

thank god!!!

she smiled at me and said "Thank you". The voice of her is still breezing in my ears....

she asked me "where is yours?" 
I said " I don't have it!"

She gave a pity look on me.....and said,

let's share it.....

I couldn't reject her invitation...so we shared it...

now she was about to leave.... I don't know what to do?

I remained starring at her...

but she didn’t...she thanked me again...and said " I owe you an Ice cream and I'll buy you that tomorrow".

she smiled at me and left the place....and I remained static until she is off my sight....
I’m exited for the next day coz she spoke to me atlast.

then the next day I was waiting for her at the parlor … hours passed. I waited for her all day. But still no sign of her.

the next day....
the next day....
the next day....
the next day....
the next day....
the next day....
the next day....
the next day....
the next day....


at last I found her....she looked like an angel to me in the white frock and she was smiling at me gorgeously ...there was a huge bunch of flower bouquets around her...

I went up to her and asked "where is the ice cream?"

She didn’t reply… but she kept smiling at me.

I told her to wait and then I bought her an ice cream and said “now you owe me two”

She smiled at me then we shared it again…



It’s been 15 years now… 

I went to see her again…


I'm so exited to see her.
I grew up as a tall smart guy but she is still the small angel with the same refreshing pretty face and the lovely smile... 

strangely she hasn’t grown an inch.

Is she an angel?

Maybe she is ….

That is why god took her back.

she died with Cystic fibrosis...she might have struggled a lot....yet she ended up with a smile on her face.

What can I say to a girl like her... May be I was not smart enough for her.

I love U....

and
.
.
.
I miss U…


---- End ----

Eden’s Golden River: A Mirage

                       

                           Eden’s Golden River: A Mirage

                                                                                      - Johnny vas

I see water flowing in a stream.

The water looks pure and beautiful.  I see the golden rays of the happy sun reflecting on the water ripples.

It looks like a Golden river of heaven.

I see trees all around the stream.

They are thick and green and dancing with the breeze with overwhelming joy. They are so in sync and hailing to the Mother Nature.

 

They are the loyal servants of the nature. How sad they can’t walk.

I see swans. They swim in the golden river. They are so beautiful and gracious. They have the great ability of separating water from milk. How sad they can’t suck grime out of water.

Every thing was so scenic. I wish what I see is real.

Because In real life…

I see water hardly flowing in the stream. The water looked dull and dark with the accumulation of dirt and I see plastics swimming instead of Fish.

It looks like a dead pond of hell.

Poor water can’t even cry to complain.

I see no trees around the stream. It is dry and dead land everywhere. Looks like they can finally walk. Oh! No. They were killed. Brutally assassinated by the so called intelligent species of the very own Earth.

Yet the trees serve their killers.

They protect them.

They comfort them.

Because

They are the loyal servants of the Mother Nature.

Poor Trees can’t even run away from them.

I see no swans in the stream. They might have tried hard to suck the grime from the water and failed.

Poor birds can’t even fly to a better place.

All of these were so happy and beautiful before the existence of us.

We may be the intelligent species on earth but we are definitely not the beautiful species...

I wish we are not real.




--- End ---